Gay dating apps make me suicidal

In Sweden, the suicide rate for men married to other men is triple that for men married to women.

In Canada, more gay men in recent years have died from suicide than HIV-related causes. Hobbes also starts a discussion on minority stress, which is caused by the additional effort required in various situations if one is also a member of a minority group. This is a reality for gay men who are open about their sexual orientation, in spite of the common misconception that coming out of the closet signals the end of a struggle.

While Grindr is a wonderful way to meet other gay men, its ubiquity has normalized problematic behaviours toward minorities. In this vein, Hobbes notes the alternative prejudices that exist within the gay community along intersectional lines: A study conducted by William Elder suggests that 90 per cent of gay men on the app wanted a partner who was tall, young, white, muscular, and masculine. There is also a personal inner dialogue that takes place when interacting with Grindr and trying to fit into the mould.

Throughout their lives, gay men are burdened with the idea that they do not belong.

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And though many gay men find a community in which to feel at home, the rejection of gay men who do not fit pre-established criteria only fuels depression and anxiety. It is the expectation that the gay community will be welcoming that may further aggravate mental health concerns for gay men when this expectation is not fulfilled.

At least they cared. So many just freeze or move aside when faced with the uncomfortable and frightening sight of a friend in distress. I think if it was me I would try to talk to them when you are not feeling completely overwhelmed and try to get them to understand what happens when you are hospitalized and if there is anything else they could try first.

Can't hurt. The public health system is very patchy, I"m sorry you feel rushed when seeing the psych.

Are 'swipe left' dating apps bad for our mental health? - BBC News

Again if it was me I'd talk to her and explain that and see if she can come up with alternative ways of doing things where there might be less time pressure in the consultations. You said she was nice so I guess there is some hope there she will see where you are coming from. I wonder how you are getting on at the moment? I would think you were not too good a few days ago when you first posted, is there less pressure and dark now? You said you had a better relationship with your mum and she knows you are gay.

Does she also know how bad you have been feeling? I found I really needed someone to look out for me, lend me strength when I was completely down. I have given you the address of the Rainbow Cafe thread - I still think you might enjoy it, there is no ice to break, just pop in. Sign up below for regular emails filled with information, advice and support for you or your loved ones. You are currently: Home Get support Online forums. Online forums Before you can post or reply in these forums, please complete your profile Complete your profile.

Cancel The title field is required! Hello, First time poster. Hi Pac, welcome to the forums im glad you decided to post. I to know the pain on being bullied at school, people can be so horrible I was raped by a teacher when I was nine and everybody knew about it. They all said the most disgusting things like I must've wanted it and enjoyed it just horrible stuff. I had the same thing going on at home to so I was living on the streets at 14 and was safer homeless.

How did you go with your visit from the mental health team you have some guts going into a medical centre like that good on you. Hope they were able to give you some help ptsd is real and vicious and something you cant face alone hope you keep posting. Croix Community Champion. I'm not being nosy but so people here can be aware of what you face at the moment.

The thread called: I really hope you come back and talk some more Croix. Gruffudd Champion Alumni. Hi Pac, I can relate to quite a lot to be sure.

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Glad you found BB, happy to listen, you are amongst friends here. Sorry, my end of post got lost. Thankyou to everyone who replied: They said they always new I was gay. I have a better relationship with my mum, not really with my dad. My brother offered me work after my redundancy working in construction, steel fixing. I did that for nearly four years.

So many of the guys were homophobic and so I hid myself once again just like in high school. The job was so hard, so physical. I'm felt like a loner. Every guy in this industry was a straight guy. I stopped working, I felt worthless and useless, a friend let me stay with them. Then end of May I broke my forearm in 3 places so couldn't even work.

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4. Ground Down: Gay Hookup Apps and Depression—a Connection?.
5. Are 'swipe left' dating apps bad for our mental health?.

I initally felt great, I had a physical reason for not being able to work! So, against my better judgement, I participate. When someone asks for nudes, I give in to the pressure and hit send. Then the conflicted feelings start to bubble to the surface. One study of gay men's dating habits found that a lot of us feel depressed minutes or hours after sending nudes to a potential hookup. They feel guilty for engaging in such a shallow and explicit interaction. But other studies found that the exchanging of nudes it an important way to establish trust —basically you are trusting this other person not to forward your dick pics to all their WhatsApp groups and they are trusting you not to do the same.

It straddles a line between intimacy and objectification, between self-love and self-deception, that's hard to parse. I know the feeling of post-nudes blues well. And it makes me wonder, why are nudes a foundation of trust? Why do complete strangers, people who don't even put images of their face in their profile, feel entitled to shots of your naked body almost immediately?

Giving up the Grind(r)

And why do I, after knowing how bad hookup app culture actually is, keep coming back? I asked some friends how they feel about it. Some told me they felt validated when the recipient of one of their nudes said the images turned them on. Others said it was a pre-requisite for casual sex and that there was no way around it. Some found it fun. Some said they didn't care.

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And a few told me they purposely don't send them, not out of shame, but to maintain a level of mystery. It's taken me a long time to love my body. I already hated the way I looked long before I had my first cellphone or heard the word "selfie.