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Always consult with your psychotherapist, physician, or psychiatrist first before changing any aspect of your treatment regimen. Do not stop your medication or change the dose of your medication without first consulting with your physician.

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No one would know more than boyfriend if he is gay. If he gets aroused by heterosexually oriented porn, then he is probably not mostly oriented towards homosexuality. Whether he is bisexual or not is a different issue but not really one that need concern you. People have powerful sexual urges for extra-marital partners all the time and many of them manage to not act on them.

I think it is more about the very different needs for safety, intimacy and sexual ecstasy that you each seem to bring to your partnership. Your boyfriend, on the other hand, appears to need a more controlled, cautious sexual path. For him, perhaps, intimacy is something that is build up slowly, along with a feeling of safety. He may only feel safe being explicitly sexual when he feels intimacy and safety already.

These two very different positions towards sex and safety and intimacy are both quite legitimate.

However, when they are crossed like this, a mismatch between the partners occurs that can be quite painful for both parties. For instance, if my extrapolations of your different positions are at all accurate, it would be very difficult if not impossible for your boyfriend to just give up his need for caution, in the same way that it would be difficult if not impossible for you to just give up your need for more passion. Those needs are a part of your respective personalities, and are there based on past experiences that are not removable. They can be modified slowly over time, given the proper loving attention, but they cannot be changed quickly.

What will be important, if you are to have a good partnership is that both of you dedicate yourselves to doing as much as you can to understanding and meeting the other party in the middle — and remembering to laugh about your differences when they are painful. More "Ask Dr.

Article excerpt

Dombeck" View Columnists. For those seeking addiction treatment for themselves or a loved one, the MentalHelp. Our helpline is offered at no cost to you and with no obligation to enter into treatment. In the multivariate analysis, age, frequency of sex with their partner, steady relationship, versatile sex role, passive sex role, problems with libido, ejaculation problems, and anodyspareunia remained as independent predictors for having ED. Ghent and Charleroi. The prevalence of ED in our survey is similar to what Hirshfield et al found. Sandfort and de Keizer speculated that MSM, as compared to heterosexual men, might find sexual problems more embarrassing and difficult to admit to, and are more vulnerable to performance anxiety because of a need to assert their masculinity.

The stress and anxiety of finding a new sex partner can cause a blockage of the ability to have an erection. Not knowing straight away the sexual preference of the new partner, being active, passive, or versatile can put pressure on erectile function. MSM who are in a steady relationship have a variety of sexual techniques to please one another, not only by penetration. There were a remarkable number of street drugs used to treat ED. Usually, these drugs were purchased anonymously over the internet and without a medical prescription. These drugs are not approved for the treatment of ED.

Little is known about the quality, the effectiveness, the side effects, and the dangers of these products. Features that attract the counterfeit market of these drugs are the high costs of the original PDE5 inhibitors and a specialized demand for such products by those willing to pay anonymously in order to avoid exposure or embarrassment.

Sexual problems in gay men

Physicians who treat patients with ED need to inform them about the true dangers of fake drugs. The counterfeiting of medications is a growing global problem that needs to be combated on all fronts. Furthermore, by not consulting a doctor, they miss useful medical information on ED and underlying diseases related to ED. More epidemiological work is required to generate solid assumptions of the prevalence rates in such subgroups of the population as the MSM population. Because there are limited studies of ED in the MSM population, cross-study comparisons are difficult to make.

This study was designed as an exploratory, hypothesis-generating investigation. In the past, there usually was a representation problem for gay studies. Not all groups based on age, gender, and education within the gay population were equally represented. Older MSM and less educated people were less represented.

Gay Men Speak About Erectile Dysfunction – ED

Medical disorders such as diabetes mellitus, hypertension, obesity, autonomic nervous disorders, neuropathy, and the use of medication for instance antihypertensive therapy are associated with ED. There were no questions about the medical history of the participants, except the knowledge of their HIV status and the use of PDE5 inhibitors. We can only generalize findings to Belgian MSM, who used the online website from which participants were recruited.

Mainly for MSM, the internet has become an important source of social networking and dating and they are early adaptors of new gadgets. In Western post-industrialized countries, asking people about their sexual preference is becoming more and more acceptable. In computer-assisted interviews, anonymous respondents are more willing to answer sensitive questions, such as on sexual preferences, than in person-to-person interviews.

A disadvantage of e-research is that men without access to the internet could not participate. Because older people have less access to the internet, older MSM were likely to be underrepresented. Among the strengths of our population-based study are its large size and the coverage of different sexual dysfunctions. Not only ED, but also problems of libido, ejaculation, and pain during sexual activity were questioned. These other sexual dysfunctions will be reported later. To our knowledge, this is the first study on the prevalence of ED and the use of medication to improve the erection among MSM in Belgium.

Further investigation of sexual dysfunctions is needed to improve the care for sexual problems in the MSM population. The authors thank all participating men for the registration and David Proot for the language editing. The study was not funded by an external organization. The condoms for the promotion of the questionnaire were provided by LSE Holland. Ethical approval. The study protocol was approved by the ethical committee of the university hospital of the Vrije Universiteit Brussel. The approval number was BUN B He has no stock or ownership to report. National Center for Biotechnology Information , U.

Int J Gen Med. Published online Jul 2. Author information Copyright and License information Disclaimer.

I Think He May Be Gay - Sexuality & Sexual Problems

This is an Open Access article which permits unrestricted noncommercial use, provided the original work is properly cited. This article has been cited by other articles in PMC. Abstract Aim To determine the prevalence of erectile dysfunction ED in a sample of the Belgian men who have sex with men MSM population, and to assess the relevance of major predictors such as age, relationship, and education.

Introduction Erectile dysfunction ED is defined as the persistent inability to obtain and maintain an erection sufficient to permit a satisfactory sexual performance. Open in a separate window. Questionnaire We developed an online questionnaire, which was available in three languages: Data management and statistical analysis The data of this study were entered in an online registration system by the participants themselves. Figure 1.

I Think He May Be Gay

Limitations Because there are limited studies of ED in the MSM population, cross-study comparisons are difficult to make. Strengths Among the strengths of our population-based study are its large size and the coverage of different sexual dysfunctions. Acknowledgments The authors thank all participating men for the registration and David Proot for the language editing.

Funding The study was not funded by an external organization. Ethical approval The study protocol was approved by the ethical committee of the university hospital of the Vrije Universiteit Brussel. The other authors have no conflicts of interest in this work. References 1. Guidelines on erectile dysfunction. Apparently I have venous leakage. Also while I can achieve an orgasm, the difference in intensity from intensity prior to surgery is substantial to huge. Sometimes I am not sure if I had one or not.

One year ago, my relationship of 20 years ended horribly due to a combination of my dysfunction, clinical depression intensified by my dysfunction, and tensions over the way my ex spent money. I moved miles and have started over on many levels. I am 58 BTW. With the baggage taken care of I now feel like getting back on the horse so to speak and becoming sexually active again. I had resigned myself to being a bottom, but my first encounter has kind of soured me to that. So I saw a new urologist this week and we discussed my history. I held nothing back and one of the first questions I asked is how much do you know about gay sex.

He immediately replied he has a surprising number of gay patients for a suburban doctor and I was not unique and that he had no issues. Then he stated some of them were led quite active sex lives. I felt immediately at ease.