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Whether your goal is monogamy, non-monogamy, moving states to be together, or something in between, it can still be a little scary to figure out exactly how to have the talk.

8 Long-Term Couples On The Best Way To DTR

We asked real long-term couples how they did it. For some, it was a short and sweet decision, and for others, the process was a little more laborious. Either way, they prove that there's no "right" way to DTR, as long as it works for you.

You can buy Game of Thrones Oreos, Game. By "throw down," I mean tell him, in no uncertain terms, how you feel. I don't mean to put words in your mouth, but maybe something like: I figure you're either into me or you're not. If you are, I really think we should make this happen — and sooner rather than later. If not, the only right thing to do is cut me loose so I can find someone who is.

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How Long Should You Wait Before Having the ‘Relationship’ Chat?.
If my love interest isn’t ready for a relationship, how long do I wait? - The Globe and Mail.
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You might get your heart broken at this point, but hey, better broken than slowly unravelled. And then back off, by which I mean stop pursuing him and "being there" for him and go out and find someone who will take one look at you and say: I'm all in! Of course, at that point, "Mr. Maybe" may come after you.

2. Give Her Time to Feel Out the Thought of Exclusivity

That's human nature for some people. By which time, of course, you might be happily unavailable. But that's the risk he's taking, and I think deep down, he knows that. Are you in a sticky situation? Send your dilemmas to damage globeandmail.

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1. Don’t Straight-Up Tell Her You Want to Be Exclusive at First!
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A loving and supportive partner, a happy relationship, and good sex that occasionally tips into the amazing column—yeah, most people would tell you that's not only enough, LIAR, it's a better relationship than the one they're currently in, recently left, or ever hope to find. But the fact that most people would like to trade places with you isn't relevant, LIAR, because what you have with your boyfriend isn't enough for you.

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You want love, happiness, stability, and the freedom to fuck other guys—and you would want that freedom even if your boyfriend was capable of dominating you in the sack just the way you like. Seeing as you know this about yourself—seeing as you know that monogamy isn't for you see: So here's what you're gonna do: Tell your lovely, loving boyfriend that nonmonogamy is a non-negotiable. You are willing, of course, to negotiate with him about the form your open relationship might take, but you must make it clear to him that a closed relationship is a recipe for disaster—because sooner or later, you will cheat on him.

If he fights on that point, LIAR, if he tells you that he's sure you're capable of being monogamous, then you can tell him that by "sooner or later" you meant "last week, with this dude I met in a bar. I think your answer to BFF last week missed an essential piece of information. She refers to herself as engaging in "drunken" threesomes and hookups. I think she needs to examine her own behavior, not that of her roommate and FWB, and the fact that her relationships seem to be fueled by the effects of her alcohol consumption.

I'm guessing her letter was fuzzy for a reason. It was probably written in a drunken haze. Nothing you say will get through to her unless you address her use of alcohol. Full disclosure: I was drinking when I wrote my response to BFF. So just as it's possible that alcohol played a role in the drama BFF described, it's possible I neglected to point that fact out because I was a little drunky myself. On the Lovecast , Dan chats with trans pioneer luminary Kate Bornstein: Got a question for Dan Savage?

Call the Savage Love Podcast at or email Dan at mail savagelove. Savage Love Sep 30, Joe Newton. You might also be interested in these: Savage Love Letter of the Day: Reader Advice Round-up by Dan Savage. Follow Dan.

when do you bring up exclusivity gay dating

When do you bring up exclusivity gay dating

8 Long-Term Couples On The Best Way To DTR

2. Give Her Time to Feel Out the Thought of Exclusivity

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