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Spit or swallow? On the one hand all of this is wonderful. Likewise, open conversations about the sexual mores of gay men are pretty fabulous. Because not every gay person is DTF. That perpetuates a vicious cycle. I feel such an expectation to have good sex and if I don't feel like that's happened then it makes me feel very self-conscious and then I project that inwards. A lot of that anxiety also comes from how my performance sexually is portrayed and my relative inexperience drives that uncertainty. When Craig became single nine months ago, he expected the sex to come rolling in.

Liam agrees that the perceived stereotypes of the gay community have impacted his confidence when it comes to sex. There can be medical reasons for a lack of personal libido. Age, physical health, mental health, and medications can all play a part. This comes after a survey by The Observer in found that libido in Britain at least had decreased overall among men and women, and another study that suggested that low desire in men under 40 has seen a sharp increase in recent years.

I am ok with virgins and told him to take his time. After 6 months, we had sex. In a week. Then a week later it was not tonight. Then a month later it was how about just foreplay.

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Each time I asked do you want to have sex and I was told some other reason not to have sex. After a year of asking, I stopped asking. I stopped feeling sexual slowly towards him at all. I felt more like a best friend rather than a bf. We broke up NYE I hope the ex the best and would like to stay friends, if that is a possibility. And even then, it seemed rather shallow. That is what makes this story so sad. I was the one denying to have sex with my boyfriend and it really bothered him.

Which led to me cheating because unlike the guy in this article, I did need sex lol. It was a frequent discussion and we did try to make it work, but ultimately we decided to just give up on sex. But believe it or not, our relationship was very strong and we loved each other regardless of our lack of sex.

You were not compatible. You have a big gap in sexual needs and level of interest. You need to find someone you love all of and who loves all of you more than you love the idea of being in love with them. I think that sex goes out of many relationships over the years but for it to go out of a relationship after only a few months has got to ring some warning bells.

I think a lot of gay men stay in these kind of relationships because they are terrified of being alone and think even a sexless relationship is better than none. It also leads to sex outside the relationship and open relationships which are rampant in the gay community.

And yes the guy in the pic has dreadful hair. He is giving Elvis a run for his money with that pompadour. Perhaps having a conversation about relationship expectations like a mature adult would save much grief and time. If you are man enough to have sex, be man enough to have a candid conversation about what you are looking for in a relationship. Communication, Compromise, and Commitment. You cannot compromise on one side if your partner fails to do their part. Why he wasted two years was a bigger question.

I remember hearing someone refer a relationship to an actual ship. My last LTR ended when the sex stopped and I was expected to be the housewife and take care of his children on the weekends when he worked nights. This is tacitly assuming that both people are on the same page about their sexual relationship. These issues can be remedied. But when one person denies another consistently and is not open to help- the relationship needs to end.

If someone has a lower sex drive or is asexual, they should seek out these types of people to have relationships with. I was in a long marriage that was pretty sexless for a variety reasons.

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We amicably broke up, but the one line of his about our sex life was that; he felt he needed more foreplay. I initiated, I did all the foreplay, I wore the sexy underwear, I begged for it and I rode it. Then he tells me, I did not put in enough foreplay? I was infuriated every day of those 6 sexless years. Six months ago I moved out of our shared bed and into the guest room.

Gave him one final chance and something must have finally clicked; we are now having regular romps just like the old days. If I were a younger man in a similar situation, I would not have held on for so many years. I so agree. Age should not slow down sex. So incredibly selfish for a partner to with hold sex. Good for you for doing something about it! I have been in the same kind of relationship for over a year now but the difference is , we have never had sex to begin with.

It can be very frustrating and very hard on my ego but I try to have understanding on his issues. In a sexless relationship for over 10 years now. Love him but the thrill is gone.

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Much tied up and invested but now his mom just recently died. Don;t know what to do. All sorts of challenges and yet so little time. My boyfriend and i have Been dating for 2. He is a bit older then me but old to start losing his sexdrive. I tell Him i wanna Have sex and he says yes but finds an excuse not to when the time comes.

I feel Sex is a way to feel connected.