How to hook up with gay guys

Expectations are false hopes that often lead to disappointments. Expectations on your way to a hook up can be a fiasco. You're not a fortune teller nor can you predict how things will go down, so why build it up?

Avoid the regret by going into the situation with an open mind. This puts you in a better position to adjust to potential setbacks or successes. Go into it with the idea that you're there to have fun, not invite him to Thanksgiving or prom. Although hookups can be, rarely are they the basis of a long-term relationship.

Even if you think the guy is the best thing ever, only the future will tell if the connection is lust or love. Hey, would you give a stranger the keys to your car and tell him to do what he wants with it, just bring it back whenever he's finished? Not a chance!

10 Things I Learned About Gay Hook-Up Culture From My Day On Grindr

Odds are you'd laugh out loud at the idea of risking your insurance premium, your transportation and any other consequences for someone you just met. So why take the chance with sex? At least you can get another car if something went wrong, but our bodies are ours until the lease expires. Ask him if he hooks up frequently or if he's into barebacking. Take condoms with you and see if he has some of his own. A little reverse psych works here, too. Ask if he likes it raw. Hold yourself to high standards, and you will avoid all unnecessary awkwardness.

Bring lube and condoms, if needed. Bring poppers if you like them, but ask if he is OK with this. Map out his address or give him directions to your place.

Do's and Don'ts

Agree on a time to meet. Exchange cell phone numbers. Use your real first name. Text or call when you arrive. What to do if you do not feel that spark. Here comes the tricky part. You've chatted, exchanged pics, discussed details, and have met up at the same place at the same time. After all of that, realize that you still might not have sex.

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When you both meet and see each other for the first time, there's still a chance that one of you is not going to be as interested as you were earlier. Even with conversations and pictures shared over the Internet or your smart phone, chemistry is difficult to predict. We get so much more information in a short period of time when we're standing right next to someone which is why some eschew the online game.

If you meet him and you are no longer interested, do not find an excuse to delay the bad news. Simply be honest and let him know that you are not interested. Don't be mean about it, but don't feel overly guilty, either. It's true that he might have driven over to your place, and now within 5 minutes the whole thing is over, but that's part of the deal. Don't make it worse by trying to make something happen when you know you do not feel it.

Dealing with rejection. Sometimes, 7 will apply, but you will be the one who's interested when he's the one who's just not feeling the same way about you. Take the above advice and apply it to yourself. Take the news and leave without making an issue of it. Hurling insults or acting like a scorned year-old does little to make someone reconsider their rejection of you; in fact, it cements their decision. It doesn't matter whether he has a kind heart or is a complete jerk because it all comes down to whether you both have a mutual interest in having sex with each other.

If that mutual interest is lacking, then it's time to admit it and leave him behind.

You can deal with your hurt feelings on your own later on. Enjoy yourself.

The Hookup Manual

If you have made it this far and you both share a mutual interest in having sex with each other, then go for it! Enjoy the ride literally and figuratively. Put your best foot forward and be open to this new experience. Explore his body and allow him to explore yours.

Kissing is usually high on a guy's turn-on list, so make sure to follow the subtle cues of what he likes.

How to Pick Up Gay Men: 12 Steps (with Pictures) - wikiHow

Guys usually give clues to show what they like and don't enjoy. For example, if you bite his nipple and he inhales quickly in pain and brushes your mouth away from his chest, then you know not to do that. Do things to him that you would want done to you. Make sure he's enjoying himself, but also that you're having fun at the same time. Don't rush it. Make the neighbors jealous. This one event can be magical and doesn't necessarily have to stop at the first orgasm.

Try to give him what he wants as long as it's also what you want , but don't force the situation. The first encounter can be but is not always the best encounter, but it's also the best time to try to discern what this guy likes and what you can offer him and vice versa. Don't assume it will be more than once. After all of the effort put into chatting with someone, meeting in person, and having a hot encounter, it's only natural to think that this could be the start of a good thing.

Hold on. First, you need to gauge how much he enjoyed it and how likely he is to want to repeat it. I got on not because I was interested in hooking up with anyone off the app, but because I wanted to explore. I wanted to see what all the buzz was about. Now, I know. For those of you who don't know what Grindr is, it's the gay man's essential hook-up app, used for quick hookups and meetups, ranging from wild sex, to jerk-off parties, to oral sex and threesomes. When you open the app, it's a candy store for hookups. There are hot bodies, cute guys and muscles galore.

There also happen to be a bunch of not-so-attractive men, guys who repeatedly message you solicitations and lots and lots of dick pics. It's a completely new world. I used a fake body actually Zac Efron's , which some people picked up on, in order to maintain total anonymity, but to still receive messages. His body is hot, so I got a lot of guys messaging me wanting to hook up.